Don't drink the tap water.
Don't watch the news.
Don't listen to your parents.

You've been asleep, a cog in a machine most dark and sinister.

You've seen the signs, you know it's true. Planet Earth is lying to you.

I am the voice that instills fear when you think outside the box.

Cave paintings privately carbon dated (by me) show they were made weeks before their historic discovery.

There are nanobots in the water you drink from the sink, and your Brita filter was made in China.

JFK knew all about it, but the difference between him and us are 600 gigawatts of firewalls and proxy servers. To the FBI agent reading through your digital eyes, you've been made.